When you read what I have to say you might think this girl does not know whether she is coming or going.
Trust me, I have been all over the Religious Show, been up and down on all the roads, got the hat, the T-shirt and the cap on all of them.
Last year I finally decided that, and trust me, this is after years and years of reading and investigating, that ALL religions have basically the same story line, I am not here to spoon-feed, go see for yourself.
Just take the Crucified Saviour to start with.
The Way, The Truth, The Life
Go and have a looksee for yourself.
I am not here to try and convince you of anything, I am just here to say my say.
A beautiful friend of mine, and beautiful she is…
She asked for help, to help her convert from Atheism.
Well I know where she is coming from, I have been to Hell and back, although I don’t even believe in “HELL”…
I’ve been raised as a Christian, to believe what the Church tells you, to read your Bible and pray and believe, well when I hit my 20’s it changed, I moved from a small town to a big city and saw that life was not just good and easy for everyone.
I also saw that the good people was not always rewarded, and the bad did not always meet Karma, you know Karma, that bitchy one … whom I also do not believe in.
For many years Religion/God/Jesus was never even a thought of mine, I carried on with my life, I also did not force any type of Religion onto my son, not then.
When I turned 40 I was married to a crazy mentally disturbed motherfucker!
He abused me in all ways possible, but that was only part of the horror. He belonged to one of the Sect Churches, well my son and I was forced to go with him, my son became too scared to go out the house, he told me, Ma what if I die, I will go to Hell!!
It was right there where I decided to act and pull myself and life together.
My son and I had to “escape” whilst he was at work, we were lucky to escape with our lives.
Sooooo … where was God, where was Jesus, we are told that He lives in us, but not one would reach out and help my son and I.
But still, we overcame and I started on my religious path once again, thanking God for saving us, now I know that it was me, myself and only I that saved my son and I, I made the decision to leave.
You might think I was a wanna-be Christian then, so NOT
I studied the Bible, most of the Editions… For those who believes the KJV is the Alpha and the Omega, go dig deeper, you will find that there were many forerunners …
The Great Bible
The KJV was a revision of the Bible based on the Bishops’ Bible which
was a revision of the Great Bible, the Great Bible being based on the
Matthew, Coverdale and Tyndale Bibles.
Many Many Many things the average Christian, Bible Puncher are not aware of.
I believed in the second-coming of Jesus, then I switched to the Rapture, how bizarre, I know.
Then back again, then I came upon fulfilled eschatology and I knew I was onto something.
In my mind then the Bible made more sense, knowing now that it was not written for us, but to the people of 2000 plus years ago.
I was still not satisfied, because the World does not make sense, a Loving God does not make sense, cause why would God decide who to bless and who not to?
Why oh why is the world filled with poverty and hunger, violence and greed?
I will tell you why, it is because of MAN/WOMAN, we are the World.
I know the world came about, whether created or just formed, I am just not sure as to how?
I do NOT believe in the Big Bang Theory, in my heart I believe it was created, but billions of years ago.
Then last year I thought after all this pain and horror I am putting myself through, I decided I was now an Atheist.
But that did not sit right with me, Atheist and Christians are very much alike, always bullying the other side.
Then after many hours of reading again I thought Deism …
Which is still a sort of religion, I thought I do believe in a God, but I could still not wrap my head around this selective God.
So, what I am finally getting to, sorry you had to sit through this whole lecture of mine.
Yesterday I had this silly experience again listening to “Christians” praising and thanking God for caring for them, whilst the Hobos where standing next to them begging.
I had a restless night as these things do keep me up at night.
This morning I came to the conclusion and I do believe this in now what it will stay…
I decided I am Agnostic.
I honestly do not care what anybody thinks of it, I honestly also do not care on what religious path you are walking, each to their own.
It took me many wasted years of trying to find the Loving God, but for crying out loud, I just can’t.
Christians believe that the Good go to Heaven and the Bad go to Hell??
I am not asking you to go and investigate any of these TRUTHS, but then again I ask of you to respect my beliefs/or lack of.
Most of my friends and family are still at where I was, it does not make a difference to me.
All I know is that we are all here on Earth, we have a life to live, we are all going to die, and good for those who end up in Heaven, wherever that may be, and well good for those who will re-incarnate, good for those who will just get eternal rest.
Heaven knows, we all deserve eternal rest after this roller coaster ride called life.
Just so you know, when you read my new postings, or see my change in belief, you will know where I am at, and rest assured I do not need medication and be sure that I am not on drugs.
So that’s it folks, like some peeps would say, I have finally arrived at my Station.
Thank you for those who actually took time to read this, I do appreciate.
I am always almost transparent, I carry my heart on my sleeve, and I say my say.
I do not pretend to be what I am not.